Overcoming stigma one step at a time

The story is told – and many believe it to be truth – of a young lady who met an influential religious leader. Despite the cultural-national differences, he said all the right words, and did all the right things, so when he offered her a chance to live with him, she agreed. 

Some time into their union, the relationship soured to the extent that she fled the home and returned to her father’s home. He did not immediately go to get her but eventually went to his in-laws. Her father seemed to have had some reservation, as he cajoled and convinced the religious leader to remain an extra night – not once but twice. 

The third time, however, the religious man insisted that he was leaving with his concubine. The journey was long and they ended up spending the night in a dangerous community. However, during the night, the people of the town felt that it was fun to harass the outsiders, and the religious leader eventually threw his woman outside to the men. She was repeatedly raped and left for dead.

She managed to drag herself to the house where they stayed, and collapsed at the door. The next morning, when he awoke, and she had not returned, he opened the door to go seek her out. There she was – lying at the open door by his feet. His resuscitative efforts proved futile. The news of her death and dismemberment caused a furor in her country. In fact, it would be described by some, as a civil war. 

Unfortunately, as disturbing and devastating as this story is, it not only remains a reality for women and girls; in some instances, there is no anger at the violation. Some even blame the females: shaming them, silencing them, or making them feel as if they are somehow at fault for the violence they experienced. Gender-based violence and abuse affects one in three women worldwide. 

Despite our progress in many areas, the stigma surrounding sexual and gender-based violence remains a significant barrier. Overcoming sexual and gender-based violence is something we must confront—together—and we can start by taking small, meaningful actions.

We can break this stigma through the Thursdays in Black campaign. It’s a simple yet profound act: wearing black every Thursday to stand in solidarity with survivors and to raise awareness about the need to end violence in all its forms. 

When we wear black for a single day each week, we do so as a collective. The impact grows exponentially. And, crucially, as we stand, we create a space for others to join us, to raise their voices, and to show that they are not alone. 

Overcoming stigma takes time, and we must take it step by step. Thursdays in Black provides us with a way to slowly but steadily shift the conversation. These conversations are not easy, but they are necessary. And as we take this journey one step at a time, we can start to build an environment where survivors feel empowered to share their stories, where they no longer have to hide in fear of judgment, and where the stigma surrounding sexual and gender-based violence is replaced by empathy, solidarity, and a commitment to justice.

But wearing black is only part of the picture. When coupled with other action, we can see tangible change. 

At the WCC, our partners have joined us in preparing Bible studies, launching protests, trainings and workshops, in addition to the material available on our website. As we stand together every Thursday, we stand on behalf of ourselves, and others who have been traumatized by the stigma of sexual and gender-based violence. 

This journey doesn’t end with one day of action. It’s about creating lasting change through ongoing effort and solidarity. Each of us has the power to challenge the status quo and to help create a community where silence is broken and healing can begin.

Let us walk this path together—one step at a time—knowing that every small action contributes to a much larger movement. By wearing black, by listening to survivors, by speaking out, and by supporting one another, we can make a significant impact. Together, we will help dismantle the stigma surrounding sexual and gender-based violence and ensure that every living victim has a chance to be a survivor and every survivor’s voice is heard, valued, and respected.